Failed but succeeded!

Ayush Meshram
3 min readNov 11, 2020

This is a story of how i attempted JEE(joint entrance examination,which is one of the toughest engineering entrance examination in the world) two times but still cant crack it rather succeeded in making my myself to get a habit of working hard.

Let me start from scrap,i had a good 91% in my 10th std. Eventually i thought engineering entrances are more like my cup of tea. I got into an institute who trains students for this massive examination. Ohh let me guide you of what really engineering entrances are in India.

With a country of over 1.32 billion population, every second Indian wants to be an engineer and by that you yourself have guessed the competition for JEE.Every year approximately 15 lakh students from the country compete with each other to be in top 10k to get into a good engieering college.

I a student f 16 years of age with a mindset of getting an all India rank 1 started my JEE coaching.As the days passed by, my level of enthusiasm got down,to help with more i had a person which can be named as distraction.I started to bunk at least one class every weak to spend time with my distraction.Unlike any distraction this also felt like a good thing happening to me,but only my daily tests score card showed how good things were not really good.This was the time that i was enjoying my life to the fullest.Days passed and by now i was promoted to class 12th.

Initial days rather initial months of class 12th were beautiful as i studied for at lest 6–7 hours a day.This went on for a few months before distraction again dominated over me.The biggest mistake of mine was that i didnt let go of it,rather it was always there beside me, making me hallucinated about its thoughts.Eventually i lost in that distraction once again.

The exam day had already come by now and only i knew that i had nothing in my head for the examinations.By touching my parents feet and showing them fake enthusiasm i went ahead to give my paper.With every step i got flashes of my times with distraction.As you all have guessed i ended up scoring too low.

The result day was the most painful day of my life with parents disappointed like never before and me with nothing but only regret in my mind, i decided to give this examination one more try and hence took a drop.I gave up distraction though it felt like a brittle chalk crushed down the floor.Doing the necessary thing i joined another coaching institute.

This time i only had two things in my mind ,to study my ass off and to proove everyone wrong who laughed at me and at my failure.I used to study for 8–9 hours a day.I cut off social media and even my closest friends,particularly i had become an intellectual self-sadist.That one year being an intellectual self-sadist i gave my exam and ended up scoring enough marks to gain some pride and a glimpse of happiness on mine as well as on my parents face.

The thought of sharing this story with you all is very specific on determining various facts to you that no matter what comes in our life we shouldn’t self doubt ourselves.With one mindset of conquering fears and making it a destinified great journey,results in a relaxation of different kind.One more thing i understood by this 3 years of havoc is to never be attached to distractions,with a capability of making one feel nice about their life ,it actually destroys it.

‘Regret’, this word carries a lot of meaning in itself and one shouldn’t get carried away by this feeling.Of course this feeling should be invoked in oneself as it is necessary for character development but getting carried away with it gets us in depression and helps us in getting anxiety attacks.

one can deal with failure easily and that is by learning through it. Any work requires a good start with a smooth floating in between and with a massive and impressive end. The above line is the key to any success and i can bet that if anyone follows it correctly, success will be defined to it.

Just three words GOOD START, SMOOTH FLOATING, IMPRESSIVE END with a pinch of never to give up attitude defines the word success. Carrying these thoughts will make every human satisfied with its life.

And that’s how i ‘failed to clear an exam but succeeded in conquering my mind’.

--

--